with Stella Barey
Do you have anyone you look up to?
Stella Barey – I’ve never really had anyone that I looked up to, but I do have a lot of positive influences. My Mom and my Grandma were such positive influences in terms of strong women, I think of them when I’m trying to ground myself. In terms of the industry, I have always loved Riley Reid because she’s such a business woman. When you really look at how she’s existed for so long in the industry, she’s an inspiration. She’s a natural girl without fake titties and a whole fake face. And the fact that she makes so much money and always has, shows that a natural girl is far more powerful. People want authenticity.
If not pornography or the medical field, then what?
SB – There’s so many things I’ve wanted to do. I really want to go back to school to study philosophy and sexuality. For now, I’ve kind of thrown it into hedonism, like let me just find freedom and make enough money to enjoy my life. But I’ve always thought that the two most important things you could do with your life were to study the world we live in, or look outward and study what’s outside of our planet; space, and astronomy, and how we even exist. Like why study marketing?
Learning is a lifelong pursuit and you read a lot… John Gardner once said that there’s only two plots in all of literature: you go on a journey or the stranger comes to town. What was your “the day that was different?”
SB – Oh my god. The night that changed the course of my life… I was working at the homeless shelter while I was doing pre-med at UCLA. I had this sexual tension with one of the clients there, a Marine vet. I wanted so badly to be with him, I couldn’t stop thinking about him and I tried so hard to resist it. But there was this night, where I was like, “You know what? Screw it.” Then I lost my anal virginity, which changed my life. It was the first time that I felt like I really started living life. It was the first time I was living the philosophies that I studied in college.
And what’s the point of studying it if you’re not going to live it!?
SB – Exactly. That was such a major turning point. I broke up with my boyfriend a week later, I went on a 1000 mile road trip spontaneously with the Marine vet and we slept in his car with no plans. I had an Organic Chemistry test that Monday that I missed, which is so not like me. My life changed fast after that night. It was anal every day in the back of his car which was also his home. It was so beautiful. It is some of the best memories of my whole life.
Interview Bella Lucio
Photography Lily Hyde
Excerpt from Issue No. 4 (2023). Read the full interview by ordering your copy here.